Beware...I’ve started writing. Who knows where this could end up? :-) I have a feeling that my fingers will type reflectively tonight as I feel in a somewhat reflective mood. I’m tired too...so its quite possible there could be many repetitions as well. I’m starting that life has many ups and downs and in-betweens. There are times when we feel like we are on the moutain top-shouting to the world "I am alive and glad to be so!" And then there are the valleys where we just have to keep walking...and walking...and walking. Yet we enjoy the beautiful scenary as it passes. And then there are the hills we climb where it is hard yet eventually we make it to the top and while we are climbing we have that goal in sight. And sometimes...there are those times when we go down into what seems like a pit only to eventually climb out agian. I wonder...sometimes I wonder how we choose to live and why we choose to live in certain ways? If that makes sense....
Its like we can choose how we respond to life. We can choose to be joyful, or sad. We can choose to embrace what is happening or not. We can choose to live our life with intetnion and adventure. What drives us? What makes us who we are? Is it what we believe? What we choose to believe? How we respondn to those around us? Is our faith so much a part of who we are that that in itself can define us?
Lots of thoughts...so much contemplation. :) Psalms 92 talks about revering God with an undivided heart. That verse is sticking with me...what does it mean to revere God really? And what does it mean to give him your whole heart? If he has our whole heart, doesn’t he have our whole life as well? And how can we live that life in a way that would reflect him? So much of life is about reflelcting something greater, isn’t it? I was realzing the other day that love here on earth is perhaps just a reflection of what God has for us. Like the feelings and care that we can’t even believe is inmaginable yet we do feel lit for other people though we can’t articulate it. Those feelings are simply an imitaiton of the real thing. That real thing being the love God has for us. I know I’ve heard that concept before..yet its struck deeper this time....something to ponder eh?
(I know I just said eh...all lthis Candian influence) :)
So, on a more informative note...I started Thai lessons week. They are going well--I've only had two so far but so far so good. Its really hard. Yet its good for me. I'm practicing so many different sounds. I can hear the differences but at times my mouth refuses to make the sound. So strange, eh? Well...I'm learning a new defintion of the word "practice". :) I know that I will only be able to take lessons for about a month and a half, yet anything I can get will help me so much for now, and hopefully for later on down the road. I really do love the language-its like music. All that choral training I've had with Roy Klassen at Pacific is more affective in learning Thai than I realized. Having learned how to listen to those around me and match my voice to theirs-ithelps as I'm working to match my voice to the CD's or my teacher's as I am trying to make these new sounds. I'm grateful it is one-on-one learning. That helps me so much. I'm still incredibly shy in my lessons, but hopefully I will get more confidant as time goes on. I'm also very grateful for all the linguistcs classes I had. At the time, I had never imagined that I would havce wanted to learn Thai and that international phonetics would come in handy, but guess how I'm learning the sounds/words in Thai? that's right-international phonetics! :)
Its been a bit of a harder week this week, yet I'm still learning so much. I listened to a friend's sermon tape today and her pastor was talking about how we need to live an adventure for God and that we need to ask him to lead us. I was struck by the realization that I would have never dreamed 2 years ago that I would be here-in Thailand, learning what it means to serve God and learning what it means to love others. Once we say God-here I am, its overwhelming and exciting to see where he takes us. Sometimes I feel like I'm just along for the ride. :) This week has been more of a day-to-day walk, but that's okay. I suppose some weeks are just like that. yet I am still learning what it means to connect with God, even day to day. I think sometimes I thought it would all be a moutain top high. I'm realizing that is not the case and even being in Thailand has its harder times, yet God is still there. Its good to be realizing that.
Learning to live open, learning to love, learning to experiment with the truth. Life may be hard...yet it is still good.
Would love to hear your thoughts on my quiet ramblings...I’m always open to conversation! So....what do you think?
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